Lessons Learned

     These past few days have been ones of reflection about what I have been thankful for during this time I have spent serving the Lord on my mission.  While the list may go on and on, there are a few which stand out the most, to me at least.  To start, I am thankful for my family and all they do to help me while I am out here serving a mission.  Just the immense amount of love and kindness they show me on a weekly basis by merely writing me letters attests to that.  Second  on that list is just the gratitude of being able to serve here in Washington DC for the short amount of time I get to spend here and just being on a mission in general.  I keep getting told by some of the members of my congregation that there is a difference between me as a missionary and those who just go to school right away.  Both are wonderful pursuits, but one is an act of charity for our fellowmen through giving the Lord two years of our time in order to share the joy that comes from the Gospel with all of those who are open to hear it.  The rest of my thankful list stems from being out here on a mission.  I would like to share with you one of the experiences for which I am so thankful to God, which has helped me to learn and grow closer to the Savior every day.
     The other day my companion and I were teaching a less active member in our ward and just visiting so that we could discern what they needed.  Somehow we got on to the subject of companionship inventory from Preach my Gospel, which is when we as a companionship just talk to each other openly about how we are feeling towards one another, which can help us both improve.  We decided that we would hold a companionship inventory with them so that they could better understand why we value this small amount of time so much.  When it got to their turn to try it, they decided to speak to me.  What I learn from them is very touching to me.  They explained about the difference we have in our thinking, and ways to help me improve our relation with one another.  As our appointment went on, they continued to share vast wells of knowledge and experience with us and we learned so much from and about each other.  So much that I am currently still thinking about what they said so that I can improve not only for this individual, but for everyone else I come in contact with.  I am so thankful that they were willing to share their knowledge with me as so I can improve upon what they taught to me last night.
     Now, why is this the hand of God in my life now you may ask?  God works His miracles in many ways and it is often though the hands of others.  For example, there was a statue of Christ damaged in a bombing back in WWII.  The artisans of the area were able to repair it all except for His hands.  With that, they made a plaque that said "You are my hands."  This statement is so profound to me and reminds me of a scripture in the Book of Mormon, Mosiah 2:17: "And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."  With this experience, I have been blessed by God with the chance to improve and come closer to Him through this knowledge I have obtained, thus I see the hand of God in my life today.

Love Thy Neighbor

     Recently, as our companionship has been going out to work, a certain thought keeps creeping its way up to the forefront of my mind--how do I love those who seek to contend with me in any shape or form.  So, how can we love someone who perhaps at times hates us?  Our first instinct most times is just to turn away from them or even to treat them as they treated us.  After all, why should I be kind to those who hit me, why should I help those who seek to tear me down at every turn, why should I turn the other cheek to be hurt again?  Why shouldn't I lash back?  That's fair, right?  They deserve it! Let that simmer for a little bit, because this is how most people think and respond to things.
     To quote one of my most favorite people, "Life isn't fair."  Which he then follows up with the definition of fair being, "Fair is getting what you want."  Now really think about this, how have you defined fair in all of your interactions?  Is it where you got some of what you want but may have made some compromises that were acceptable to you so that you could get the desired result?  Most of the time, this is what we do.  I do it all the time with everyone else, mostly subconsciously, not even fully aware that I am just focused on my own selfish self.  But is this what God wants us to be?  This is what Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles told missionaries in the MTC about Jesus Christ:

"Christ turns out when the natural man would turn in."

     Now, that one statement describes so much about what our Savior and God wants us to be.  Christ  always turns out and is unselfish, when we would be selfish and just focused on us.  God wants the best for us, so we need to be like our perfect example, Jesus Christ; we need to be as unselfish as we possibly can.  So, how does being unselfish tie into loving someone who hates us?  Well, what I have learned about this is that for me to love someone I need to be unselfish in my dealings with them.  As God loves us so perfectly and unselfishly despite what ever we may do, we need to show that same love to all that we come into contact with.  How we do that is by serving them and thinking the best of them, despite whatever they may do to us.  I'm not saying this is easy, but it is definitely worth it.

     To share an experience with this, the other day we were teaching one of our investigators about the Gospel.  She was going back and forth with us as we tried to share with her what we knew to be true.  As I prayed for help from God to better help her understand, we started drawing comparisons with the bible and book of Mormon and she started to see how cool the book actually is.  It was after doing this out of love and compassion for her, not just insisting that we were right,  that she really opened up to us and now wants us to come back and teach her more.  Through our showing her respect, kindness, and love, she responded in kind.

Who am I?

     That's a great question.  It's a question that can go just about in any direction and is mostly dependent on your own mood at the time.  So, who am I?  I could easily start off by saying that I am a Texan and that is where I live.  Or, I can define myself as an American who loves the fact that he has freedom in this world where many don't.  What would that say about me?  Would it say that I am just measly, defined by where I live, and that is what is most important in my life or what I am most proud about?  So, what if I am not defined by where I live, but by what I do and all the wonderful things I have accomplished in this life so far.  Would that be any closer to defining who I am?  I have made a duct tape suit and dress for prom, I have built many theater sets for high school, and I have run the backstage work for these shows so that they run smoothly.  I have been a part of three different marching band shows in high school and a part of many award-winning band groups, both in concert and out on the field.  Then, with my academics, I have gone to state competitions in German and in the sciences.  I have gotten accepted into Brigham Young University and have done well with my studies there so far.  Does that even begin to describe me?  There is a song I would like to quote from the movie, The Prince of Egypt.  Moses' father-in-law sings this song to him when he is feeling down and rather worthless in the sight of man.  These are the words his father-in-law sings:

"How can you measure the worth of a man, by what he builds or buys? You can never see with your eyes on Earth.  Look at your life through Heaven's Eyes."

     So, again I ask, how do you define someone--by looking at them as a man sees them?  A man only sees what they have done, what they do now, and what will they do in the future, and most people are content with that.  But I am not.  How can you see all the good they have done which is not measured appreciably by man.  How can you see all of the tender moments spent comforting someone who has lost a brother, for instance?  How can you see the eternal impact of helping someone else receive the same joy you have?  How can you look at a man and judge him merely by what the world cares about?  You cannot define or measure a man without the help of our Heavenly Father.  We can not know of the infinite potential another human being has, no matter their race, creed, or nationality, etc. without the infinite knowledge our loving Father in Heaven has for each of us.  

     To define all that I do into one easy statement:  I am a child of God, who is the most creative and most infinite being of the Universe.  How easy is it, then, to know of my worth and appreciate all the good that can come from just me alone?  To know that I comfort those who stand in need of comfort?  That I, too, need to be comforted because I make mistakes along the way? 

     In explanation of the subject matter of this post, we were out helping one of the older members of our ward with some things she needed done around her home.  We always love coming to her home and seeing the bright smile that comes to her face whenever we come and freely impart of the time we have that day, even if it's just for a little while.  Despite all the trials that have been coming to her lately, she still manages to be happy when we are around.  Us just listening and trying to show her the love that Jesus would show if he was there, means all the world to her.  This very simple act of listening, is not something which would normally be measured by man, but it is measured by God.  For He wants us to be as His perfect son, Jesus Christ is--to show charity, or His love to everyone around us, no matter what they have done, or perhaps will do to us.

    I am a Child of our Heavenly Father, and that is who I am.  So, I ask the question to all of you, Who are you?

Duct Tape Flowers

     Whether good or bad, at this point I know not, but my awesome companion bought 17 rolls of Duct Tape on Preparation Day for me to help teach him all that I know about duct tape crafts.  As to how this all came about, I'll point my finger to the fact that I have loved making things out of duct tape for years, mostly just to see the smile my simple little crafts bring to people's faces.  These duct tape creations are nothing major by any means, but yet they still manage to touch all that come into contact with them.  As for my companion, I have now taught him how to make flowers because they were a fairly simple thing to start with.  After making a couple, the first thought that came to his head, with no prompting on our part, was to make a little bouquet to send to his mom so that she could enjoy the simple beauty of these little crafts.
     Now, is 17 rolls a bit excessive?  Perhaps, but if we continue to use our creations to bring joy to others, our small acts of service will be worth it.  As it says in Mosiah 2:17, "And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."  I know that as we continually strive to help brighten someone's day, by whatever means we may posses, we can help lift other's burdens and we ourselves will be much happier.

Repeatedly Trying

     Yesterday was our Preparation day once again, and like always, it managed to be more busy than we thought it would be.  With trips out to Marshall's for sweaters, then to Aldi's for food, we got our errands done so that we were able to go out and play soccer with one of our recent converts and a few of her friends. When we got out there to finally start playing, the temperature was sitting right around 40 ish degrees and the wind was constantly blowing, almost enough to snuff out our candle of enthusiastic glee  for soccer that afternoon.  With our cold, but merry, band of friends we proceeded to play, while one of her friends came just to be there sort of thing.  We invited him to play many times, but his resolve was his to work out.   However, the idea here is that we did invite him despite what we knew the answer would be.  As we continued to play, we invited him once again, thinking to ourselves that he would probably say no.  But to our surprise, he said yes and joined us in partaking of the joy we gain from just playing soccer together as friends.  These seemingly small acts helped us to show him that we cared for him and wanted to have fun with him.  We could have stopped trying after our first attempt, and just let him be, alone and out there sitting in the cold.  But we did not--all because we wanted him to have what we had.
     This same principle applies very realistically to what I do everyday out here as a missionary.  I go and try to share the Gospel with others who, currently, do not have it.  Why, you may ask?  For the same reason-- because I want them to experience the joy that I have gained from being a member of this Church.  Many times we could have easily given up hope on others as they reject our glad offer of happiness, but we try, try again so hopefully we can help someone grow closer to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
     So, how is this a part of seeing God's Hand in my life?  Well, by trying to help someone else grow closer to Him, He is allowing me to help in His work, in His way, and this allows me to be a bit more loving to everyone I meet.
 

The Lord will have a Humble Elder

     One would think that the more you study something, the more you would know about it and feel closer to understanding it as a whole.  One would usually be correct in this assumption, however, that is not the experience I have had this week.  I have been studying recently about the attribute of Humility in my daily studies and how to apply it in order to be more humble in my actions.  A couple of things have happened as I have been out here serving a mission that have helped me to understand why it is so important to be humble.
     To begin with, as a missionary we talk with our leaders in order to better help the people in our area.  We are not all perfect, but when we council together we have increased ability to do what the Lord would have us do.  During a couple of these meetings, I have had the opportunity to publicly acknowledge the mistakes I have made in the past and try to do better in the future.  Not that the impact of these actions was bad, but I could have done things better.  I have to admit that my initial reaction was a little anger and embarrassment that my leaders would call me out in front of others, but as I look back, why should I have been angry?  All they want to do is help me understand what they have come to realize over the course of their lives through the mistakes they have made in taking similar actions to the ones I took.  I should have been grateful that they want to help me change, not angry that they pointed out my mistakes!
     In short, I can wrap this up in one statement through a quote I heard in the Missionary Training Center from Jenny Oaks Baker:  "The Lord will have a humble [Wesley]."  So, as I am trying to work at being more humble, the Lord will help me by putting these experiences in my path.  In humbling myself before Him, I can learn to do what He wants, instead of what I want.
-Elder Wesley Cannon